step-by-step

ice, at eight months, is now learning to walk by the help of the walker. when we put her down she'd look very excited and she'd start to "walk" her way around our living room. but at times when we just lay her down the mat, she'd roll all over it, and make way crawling around even beyond the borders of the mat. it's really heart-warming to see your child learn new things and take her milestones. though, right at this moment she and rain are having cough for almost a week now. there were nights when we can not sleep right because both of them were coughing profusely, alternately and sometimes both at once. truly, the hardest part of being a parent, a mother specifically, is carrying the burden of seeing your children getting sick. i can feel their pain a thousand folds.

Finally Found My Place

Hello, guys! Haven't really updated my page for awhile now.

I am now working as an Accounting Processor in Philippine Ports Aurhority -PMO Tagbilaran. I started on October 20, 2008. Had a call from the Finance OIC Ma'am Felda the night of October 19, 2008 telling me that I had to start the following day. I can still remember how happy i was..

The Pursuit of Happyness

Starring Will Smith, Thandie Newton and Jaden Smith

In The Pursuit of Happyness, Chris Gardner (Will Smith) is a family man struggling to make ends meet. Despite his valiant attempts to help keep the family afloat, the mother (Thandie Newton) of his five-year-old son Christopher (Jaden Christopher Syre Smith) is buckling under the constant strain of financial pressure. No longer able to cope, she reluctantly decides to leave.

Chris, now a single father, continues to doggedly pursue a better-paying job using every sales skill he knows. He lands an internship at a prestigious stock brokerage firm, and although there is no salary, he accepts, hopeful he will end the program with a job and a promising future. Without a financial cushion, Chris and his son are soon evicted from their apartment and forced to sleep in shelters, bus stations, bathrooms or wherever they can find refuge for the night.

Despite his troubles, Chris continues to honor his commitment as a loving and caring father, using the affection and trust his son has placed in him as an impetus to overcome the obstacles he faces.


Columbia Pictures presents in association with Relativity Media an Overbrook Entertainment/Escape Artists Production The Pursuit of Happyness starring Will Smith, Thandie Newton and introducing Jaden Christopher Syre Smith. The film is directed by Gabriele Muccino and written by Steven Conrad. The producers are Todd Black, Jason Blumenthal, Steve Tisch, James Lassiter and Will Smith. The executive producers are Louis D'Esposito, Mark Clayman, David Alper and Teddy Zee. The director of photography is Phedon Papamichael ASC. The production designer is J. Michael Riva. The film editor is Hughes Winborne, A.C.E. The costume designer is Sharen Davis. The music is by Andrea Guerra.

The Pursuit of Happyness has been rated PG-13 by the Motion Picture Association of America for Some Language.

The Pursuit of Happyness was released by Columbia Pictures on December 15, 2006.


Official Movie Site: www.sonypictures.com/movies/thepursuitofhappyness/


for the nth time, i watched the movie of will smith with his son jaden. and for the gazillionth time, i cried. i think this movie is the saddest and happiest movie (at the same time) i've seen so far. when it's will smith, it's gotta be good. with a big PLUS: JADEN SMITH

this movie really touched me. knowing the hardships of a parent, i truly can relate to the story of this father & son. i wish i also have cris' (will smith's character) perseverance and patience. and i wish my kids will be as understanding and loving as cristopher (jaden). it really shows how great a father's love is for his son. i'll never regret watching this movie and i will still watch it over and over. it's a must-see for all parents. and to think, it is based on a true story.

just got unlucky?

i just had a minor accident this morning on my way to work. poor me. the road from our house to the next street corner (approx 100m) is a rough road. and i don't know when will it ever improve. it really looks like a disaster especially on rainy days. when i was about to enter the highway the motorcycle i rode with slipped through the edge of the asphalt road. urgh! so the motorcycle fell down, including poor me, of course. but, the impact wasn't that hard so i was able to immediately get up and get back on the road. some friends who also was on the road stopped by to check if i was alright. of course, physically, i was alright. thank Highness, i only got scratches in my left knee and palm. but, boy, it really is painful, how small it may seem to be. but the most affected part was my ego. it's so embarrassing. eventhough it wasn't a busy and crowded place, some people around (most of them i know) and some passersby came to look at me. it's just that i've been driving in that area for several years now and nothing like this ever happened to me before.

but i guess, if i take it as it is and admit my clumsiness, it wouldn't be that too embarassing anymore. just this morning also i read a quote at the back of a tricycle saying "your presence of mind today is your safety tomorrow". and now, i know why. now i'm going to be less clumsy and more careful in my driving especially on a motorcycle. i'm just glad and thankful that i didn't get big damages and my daughter wasn't riding with. and the worst case scenario would have been -- a big truck coming afterward, at a high speed, and wouldn't expect me to be down there (since i was on a blind curve) and then hit me down. huhuhuhhuh... no, no, no, no! thank God, so much, "that" didn't happen.

i think this incident was a test for me. i was planning to go to PPA to submit a job application. and there are really instances wherein some things must happen to test our worthiness for something good from God. so we must make ourselves worthy of His blessings. i just pray that i have proven myself worthy to Him since i already have successfully submitted my portfolio as planned.

i guess, the lesson for this is that there are still a lot in life that we have to be thankful for. and life is a precious gift from God so we must value it and take care of it. we definitely have one life and we do not know when it's going to be taken away from us. many are relying on us --not just our hardwork but most definitely also our safety and well-being. we must always journey through life with God because only He has the power to save us and keep ous away from evil.

so was i unlucky?

NO.

i was blessed.

what keeps me busy when i'm not busy

Jane's Hotel - Family Hero



Click here to play this game

never gonna stop missing you

it's has been several months already. but i still cannot bear the fact that she' gone forever. today is supposedly her 12th birthday. i can still remember her first birthday with us last year.

from the day she stepped in our home, i already accepted her as part of the family. i have decided to help her fulfill her dreams. she wanted to be a nurse. i'd provide her with a better life with us because i know it has been difficult for her as a child. she never really had the family she wanted and i know i can give it to her.

she is jerelyn. we call her "hunny". she is my cousin's daughter. she could have already been in the 6th grade this year. their family story is a bit complicated. and i never really heard her complain. i know that she is a very nice girl. she passed away may 1, 2008. she died of ITP. it was a sudden death. it was only less than a month since we let her checked up by a doctor.

she had been with us for almost two years. she came to live with us through her mother's request may 2006. but even with our short time together, she already had become part of the family. she had helped us a lot in our home. doing some chores and helping me out with rain. i never neglected her with anything that she needs. i treated her like my own child. i've always shown her that i care for her. and i feel really sorry because i feel that what i have shown her was not enough to make her life better. that i never really reached out to her and let her feel that i do love her as my own child. i know i still have so much to give her, more than material things. i know she still needed so much more. i never expected she'd be away that soon. i had plans for her future. i thought she'd always be with us. i have so many regrets on how i treated her. i feel that i was too wicked on her specially during my pregnancy. she was afraid to make mistakes because she knew i'd scold her. it was like i took life's negativities on her and yet she never complained. she stood by me. and helped me all throughout. she knew i wasn't in my right state, she knew i had difficulties, she knew i needed her. and i can't stand the fact that it's all gone now. she's gone now. and never to return. and i've nothing to do with it. and i'd spend my whole life regretting every bad word i've said to her. i feel i was so evil. like i'm the villain in her story. like i never loved her that much. but i do. i always will. i don't know if she knows it. there's no way that i can tell or show her now. she is gone. she's gone.

i have promised her one time when i visited her that it's going to be different when she comes home from the hospital. i will not scold her anymore and that she still had to fulfill her dreams to go to college and i'll help her. i also told her that she has to get well so that she can go home because rain is already asking about her, that they're going to attend "flores de mayo", and the school year is about to begin. eventhough she was in comatose, i knew she heard me. my cousin(her aunt) was also there and we both were crying and i saw hunny getting teary-eyed also. when i asked her if she understood me, she moved and nodded a bit. right then, i thought, everything's gonna be just fine. her being gone never really occurred in my mind.

my 14-year old sister-in-law who also comes in the house everyday to do the housekeeping told me on hunny's wake that hunny has been feeling not well since february this year. she had been complaining on her headache and that she didn't want me to know it. so it was only then that my sis-in-law told me. i was frozen when i heard that. i blamed everything on me.why haven't she told me? why? was i not that deserving to know the truth? am i that scary? i really could not get it.

and i wasn't able to be with her on her deathbed because i was helping out at my parents' house during the Tagbilaran feast day. i was planning to go that day as i've always visited her everyday since she was admitted at the hospital. though her mother and my other cousin(her aunt) was taking charge of her at the hospital --also in finding for blood donors and buying medicines and other things she needed, i've always been keeping track of things, how she's doing and finding funds to finance her medicines and expenses. i had to do my part even just through texting and contacting people because i can't run off that easily because i just gave birth (april 9) with my second child. i would hear people saying to just give up because we'd just be wasting our effort and money because her sickness has a very little chance of cure. upon hearing this kind of things, at first, i'd get weak and would cry really hard, but i can't just give up because they said so. i will do whatever it takes to save her. i can't imagine loosing her. it never really occurred to me because i've always thought that she'd get well soon. i never accepted the possibility that she'd be gone. that day (may 1) in the afternoon, when i was about to visit her (after planning to do so all day), i received a text message stating the saddest news in my entire life. i cried really hard. everybody was asking me why? but i assume they already know why. i never experienced crying that way ever before. i never have felt that kind of pain and sorrow. but when rain saw me crying, she cried as well. so i tried to relax and kept calm. though, i can felt really painful inside. but when i see my kids, i just can't breakdown and cry. i know they still need me, so i decided to stay firm. though, there are times when i can't help it, i just cry for a while and then hold back.

after few months, i still cannot get over the fact that she's gone. and i believe i never will. i just can't understand the fact of death. it has always been my greatest fear. though, i know the place where she is right now is much much better than what we have here. my sorrows and regrets are not for her, but for myself. my life is now blended with sorrow. i know there will be so much more to come, more pains and still more joys, but never will this sorrow ever leave. i will always be sorrowful for the rest of my life. i may smile or laugh out loud facing the whole world. but deep inside of me there is a very dark room wondering the occurrences in my life. and i never will discover the mystery of it.

Ice on YouTube

Rain on YouTube

ice is beginning to eat solid food

http://www.wholesomebabyfood.com

ice has just turned 5 months last sept 9. so we started giving her solid food in addition to milk. we milled the rice so it becomes like a rice powder or something. we cook it into a very soft porridge and mix some mashed vegies, egg, or flaked fish. we feed her solid food twice a day at the moment, in the morning and during lunch. we also occasionally give her soft biscuits for her to munch sometimes to avoid her from thumbsucking instead. i am the one who gives her her breakfast before i go to work. i get amused whenever i feed her. she gets excited whenever she sees the spoon. she swallows the food quickly. but we try to control the food we give her because her stomach still does not digest that well.

maybe, we have done something wrong in training rain to eat that caused her to become a picky-eater. i have not been that keen on her diet before. or maybe that's just the way she is. but either way, i am trying to get facts on children diet to do it right with ice this time.

i have bumped into a nice website www.wholesomebabyfood.com on baby diet and found this.

here's what i learned and intend to give her. for more about this, click here

Four to Six (4-6) Months old Try mixing together the foods that you have already introduced without allergies or reactions. Rice Cereal mixed with Bananas for example.

CEREALS Rice Barley Oat

FRUITS Apples Bananas Pears Avocado

VEGGIES Sweet Potatoes Acorn/Butternut Squash Green Beans

rain's favorite food

rain as i have said in my previous blog is a picky-eater. but there are times when she eats well especially if i serve her with foods that she likes. she loves spaghetti. when we dine in fast foods, that's what she always asks me to order for her. she also loves fried chicken, specifically buttered chicken. she also loves pizza. when we order hawaiian pizza, she eats it with a certain procedure. first, she eats the ham. then, the pineapple chunks. after that is the sauce. and lastly, the crust. amusing, isn't it? but that's the way she eats pizza.

rain as a child(proud to say) loves to eat veggies. believe it or not. it is so easy to feed her when we serve her with veggies, especially vegetable soup. she loves "okra" the most. she also likes to eat beans and leafy vegetables. she eats squash only occasionally. when she was still below 2 years old, she had a vitamin A "overdose". shame on me, it was because i used to serve her with mashed squash and carrots almost every meal. i really didn't know that it was not the right thing to do. fortunately, she didn't get weak or sick. but her skin turned yellowish. the friend doctor said that it was due to excessive vitamin A in her body. so we stopped giving her squash and carrots. fortunately, thank God, the yellowish color of her skin disappeared eventually.

normally, craving for sweets and "junk foods" is inevitable for a child. and rain has it too. but she has been (more than once) diagnosed with UTI. so we'd always tell her that "junk foods" are not good for her body, she might be sent to the doctor again, and be injected, and it would really hurt, and so on. fortunately, she'd always listen, and would instead ask for cookies or bread. about candies, we give her some at times, but not always, just as a reward maybe. but as much as possible, we do not let her see candies at home. but when we go to the grocery store, she'd ask for something sweet (chocolate, lollipop, cotton candy, or whatever). thinking rain usually acts like an adult, i try to compromise and negotiate with her in an adult way. like, "rain, how about we buy you milk instead of this", "hey, maybe this is much better", "oh no, the dentist says you cannot always eat sweets, she might pull all your teeth", and many more.


grandpa: the spoiler
in one of the photos above, she was eating corn, which she also loves to eat. her grandpa(my dad) always buys her boiled corn. he is the one who spoils her the most, considering rain being his first granddaughter. she gives her practically "everything" she asks from him. which, giving us (her parents) a difficult time to refuse whatever she asks from us. when this happens, she'd always say, "alright, i'll tell grandpa". her grandpa knows what she likes to eat. and he loves to see her indulge in some food she really likes. he always buys her peanut butter, peanuts, and chocolates. whenever they go to the grocery store, the cart would be full of rain's favorite foods, including sweets and "junk foods". but now, maybe he had realized what his spoiling was causing her, so he kinda toned down a little. now they wouldn't go to the mall that often. or maybe, he had gotten bankrupt because of her (tsk-tsk-tsk...hahaha). but still and always, he never fails to show rain how much he loves her. and rain obviously has a special affection for her grandpa. i really do appreciate their relationship. only rain could tame down "the great eduardo".